A REALLY BIG SPIDER

In a room upstairs where had some stuff stored, Kathy walked in and came back out yelling for Gary. He ran up and Kathy said there is something really big on the floor. We creepy into the room and there was the realization of Gary's night mares. A gigantic brown spider, probably four times larger than the biggest wolf spider in salt lake. It was on it back. We figured it was going to flip over and jump on us. Gary ran down stairs for the only weapons available: a broom and a dust pan. Shielding each other, we approached the beast with weapons ready. We pushed it with the broom while positioning ourselves to run for dear life. It was playing dead. So, Gary pulled every big of courage he had, swept the thing into the dust pan, it barely fit and threw it out the window. Exhausted, gary and Kathy retreated to their bedroom keeping the weapons close, and, with much fear, got ready for bed. This is not the worst part of the story, Gary now has to face the scariest thing of all, his imagination!!
This night is not done yet. We are laying in our bed reading a few verses from the Spanish Book of Mormon, we look up, and right over our head is a big black bug! We stare at it close and it seems to be staggering ready to fall!! Gary gets his broom weapon and has the plan to sweep it aside. As he goes in for the sweep, Kathy doesn't trust him and jumps out of the bed screaming!! Gary's sweep was dead on and the bug is not in the bed, at least we don't think it is.