A HAPPY MARRIAGE FOR 50 YEARS

Little battles

We have been generally happily married for 50 years.    We were wondering what is the reason that we are still together and enjoying each other.   Well, one reason is our daily battles!   Each day, for some reason, we start the day with a mini argument, or, more like a debate.   We disagree on a lot of little things.   Are we going to deliver the Book of Mormon, that we prepared with a picture of us and a testimony, to an investigator today or tomorrow.   Are we going to walk to the market or try to find a parking place.   When is Gary going to get the car washed.   Getting Kathy out of bed, ... And so on.  We are both strong willed is part of the problem.   And, Kathy gets board very fast.  For example, we find a good restaurant and Gary wants to return, but, Kathy will say "we have been there to much lets go some place else".   If we didn't have these little battles, Kathy would have been board with Gary long ago and dumped him.

The cleaning lady problem

We are gone almost all day so we have a single mom that needs the money, clean our house once a week.  We have a wall cupboard that is sort of a food pantry.   To look at it, one would say "what a mess" but, Kathy knows exactly where everything is.   When the cleaning comes, she carefully organizes the entire cupboard.  When Kathy gets home, she gets really upset and complains about the cleaning lady for hours. She puts everything back where she wants it.  Well, without saying a word to each other about the cupboard, the cleaning lady and Kathy have communicated somehow and have reached a compromise.   The cupboard is now slightly organized and slightly messy.

Here is the cupboard

The primary presentation

As we mentioned before, we are attending these meetings called hermanmientos.   We attended one this last Wednesday and it was presented by the primary.  We sat in the front row so we could here better.   The program began and the kids were delightful.   Then the speakers started.  A girl about 10 gave a talk about a scripture, she read the scripture, we could not understand a thing.  Then she stopped and pointed directly at Gary and asked him to explain this scripture!!  Everyone looked at Gary as he sat there and stammered.  How embarrassing, finally he said, sorry only English.   So, the girl ask another person, and, copying Gary, he said "only english".  This went on for a while all at Gary's expense.  Believe it or not, another little girl got up and read a story and the same thing happened again!  Well, the next day we attended another one of these meetings, but, this time we sat in the back with hoodies on.

Norea

We went with the missioneries in an area that is not doing well at all for baptisms.   We attended the ward for this area some time ago and it was very depressing.  Very few members and just a "down" attitude.  We knocked on the door of one less active and no one answered the door.  We went to another house of an inactive lady, and, she was home.  The four of us went into her house and sat down.  She told us that she taught kindergarten and she had been preparing lessons.  The missionaries taught for a while, then Gary, asked her why she doesn't come to church.  And, she bust into trears, Kathy hugged her and she cried for some time,  she began to tell her story:  her family had major problems and neither the bishop or the stake president came to help.  She was very upset with them and quit coming to church.  We talked to her a while about putting her faith only in the Savior and she would not be led wrong.  Kathy asked her if she wanted a blessing and Gary gave her a blessing in Spanish.  We asked the elders to take her to church and to ask the bishop to not confront her for a few Sundays.  She agreed.   By the way, she has gone to the Temple.  We do not know the status of her husband other than there is something major wrong.  We said goodby.  While walking, the elders shared with us what a blessing this meeting was.  They had never found her home, she is always working, and, we got a commitment for her to come to church.   We all felt that Heavenly Father had led us to this meeting to help this wonderful lady. 

Gary finally got warm

CAFFEINE FREE

Hermanamiento Reunion
Most of the wards and branches here have this meeting.   It occurs on a week night and its purpose is for fellowshipping and gospel education.   An organization or a family is assigned to do the meeting.  And, there are refreshments after.   We have been going to this meeting Tuesday through Friday, attending a different ward and branch each night.  On Wednesday we attended this meeting at the Alameda Ward.  It was presented by the Young Mens Priest Quorum.   One of the priests did the gospel education part.  We were so impressed, he was well prepared, used the white board, and asked question of the group, and we learned a lot.  At the completion of his lesson, all of the priests came to the front and each one of them stated from memory an Articles of Faith, there were 12 Priests and the Young Mens President to complete the 13.   Then, we had hot drinks and rolls.  (we always have hot drinks because it is very cold).   We were so impressed.  The other meeting we attended were also good.  But, we thought this meeting was special.

Gary in Tights,
Gary was so cold in our house he was miserable.   He had three coats on but his legs were freezing in his dress pants.  So, Kathy brought out her spandex tights, 3/4 length.  He has worn them for a few days now and has been quite warm.

Elder Soares
Elder Soares is a member of the presidency of the Seventy.   He came to a city here in our mission to talk to all the missionaries.   For us, it is a long hard drive to get there and back.  So, we were complaining a bit about driving all that way and sitting for two hours not understanding anything.  But, we were obedient to the invite by the president and we drove to the meeting.  Well, it turns out that Elder Soares is from Brazil.  His wife gave a great talk in english with a Spanish translator.  We enjoyed it very much.  Then Elder Soares came to the stand.  He can speak Portuguese, French, English, and, is learning Spanish.   He gave his whole two hour talk in clear and not to fast Spanish and we understood the whole talk.  Another one of those repenting experiences.
He told us his story of becoming an LDS member.  It gave a lot of hope to all of us.  He was converted my Missionaries in his little branch that consisted of four families.   Now, there are two stakes in place of his branch and he is a President of the Seventy.

The Restoration
We of course are always struggling with the language and have experienced some very humbling times, but, when we are with an investigator  result:[] spirit takes over.  We went with the missionaries to visit a middle aged man.  His son of 22 has cancer and is in treatment and it is very serious.  The missionaries talked to him and then they turned to us, and, we went through the entire story of the restoration from the primitive church to now.  It was amazing.  We could never repeat it, but, it was a great joy that for a few moments were a tool in the hands of the Lord.

Caffeine Free
Our drive back from Elder Soares meeting was long and hard.  We stopped at a store and there on the shelf was diet Dr. Pepper.  Our favorite drink. And we have never seen it here before.  Now, we have tried very hard not to have caffeine drinks since there is this mission rule that no one can drink diet Coke.  But, we were tired and we had a long way to go so we bought the Dr. Pepper.  We had gotten some food to eat along the way, and, after we finished to food, we were both so excited to drink the Dr. Pepper.  Well, we opened the can and it did not taste to good so Kathy finally put on her glasses, which she did not have on when she bought it, and read the label.  It was caffeine free!!  Saved from breaking the rules by Kathy not being able to see up close!!!

Some pictures of the Sisters in our area at our house making a cake for the Elders for P Day

ADDENDUM

THE PRESIDENTS CAR

we were shopping today and in the store we met the Stake President and his family.  Really nice people.   After a short conversation, we went on shopping and they went out the door.  We checked out and carried our bags to the back of the car.   Gary clicked the remote to unlock the car and opened the back door. As Gary was opening the door he commented to Kathy about how dirty the car was.  Gary set a package on the floor of the car as the door was almost opened.  We looked up and there was the presidents family looking at us very strangly.   They have the identical car to ours, but, more dirty.  How embarrassing!   We carefully after a thousand apologies, shut the door and got into our car.   To top It off, we determined hours later that we left a bag of a groceries in their car!

THE BLESSING OF BEING HUMBLED

ROCIO
We were asked to go with the missionaries to visit a investigator.   We drove to the house, or the door, and it was within a line of connected house as usual.   We rang the bell, and the door opened.  Inside the house was amazing.  It looked like a very nice house in the USA.  And, there was Rocio.  We visited with Rocio for about and hour, we bore our testimony about the gifts of being a member, and, the missioneries presented a lesson and talked about a baptism date.  Now, Rocio is reading the Book of Mormon and loves it.  She has been taught several times by other missionaries.   She is almost ready for baptism except for a couple of things.   One thing important to her is the actually baptism.  Rocio is a very large young lady.  She is very concerned that we will not be able to find a white dress to fit her, and, she is very afraid that if a missionary takes her down in the water he will not be able to pull her up.  She is a very bright and informed person and she would really gain a lot by joining the church.  She is a single un married mom of a baby girl and there is no Dad to be found.  We were able to talk to her several more times and she came to church.  We did some investigation and we have some sister missionaries that said they could make a dress for her, and, we promised her that there would be at least two elders in the water with her if she agreed to baptism.   We are very concerned for Rocio and we have been praying continually that she will decide to be baptized.  With the gift of the Holy Ghost she will have peace in her heart and she will be gently guided in her decisions to lead her into a much better and happy life.

BAPTISM TRICKS
We have found that when it comes to baptisms, nothing can stop a missionary from getting the job done.  A couple of examples:
Most of the little towns around us all have problems with water and electricity.   Either there is no water, or no electricity, or both.   Well, a baptism was arranged in a little town called Palo Gordo.  In the morning of the baptism, the elders found that there was no water.  So, they thought for a solution, and decided to call the Bomberos (firemen).  Here, there are not many rules or restrictions, so, here comes the fire truck with there hose and a tank full of water.  In this case, the water was going to be cold.  At baptism time the young girl and the missionary were freezing but got the job done really fast.
Another case, they needed to have hot water but there was none (the buildings that have fonts also have a hot water heater).   So, they borrowed gigantic pans from a member and heated the water on the stove in the kitchen and added the hot water to the very cold water in the font.
Our last example is the problem with keys.  Many times the missionaries go the the chapel to fill the font and they can not get in.  They call a bunch of people that are usually not home since they have gone to work.  We were called by some sister missionaries with this problem.  We tried to contact the bishop and others that might have a key but no luck.  Now, the glass barrier in front of the font is about 7+ feet tall, and, on the font side, the drop to the floor of the font is about 12 feet.  We called the sisters back to tell them we had to find another way, and, they said, no problem, the elders came and one of them climbed over the glass wall.  We found out later that this happens all the time.

GRANDMA IN THE WATER
This is one of those stories that maybe to appreciate it "you would have to be there", but, her goes.
We went to a baptism.  There were lots of people there.  We asked the elders who was being baptized.  They took us to this little old lady.  This lady has had 4 grandsons on mission and her family are all members.  This was an amazing time for the family.  Then we found out that the person that was going to baptize her was her young grandson, of about 16 years, a Priest.  Well, we took pictures and both Kathy and Gary teared up.  It was such a special occasion for all of us to experience.  This event reminded Kathy and Gary of their own family:  Gary's father became converted at 80 and went to the temple at 81.  He loved his membership for the rest of his life.   Kathy's uncle got baptized at 80 and he took his wife the the temple.  He always said that his years as a member were the happiest in his life.

MARRIED ELDER
We had a very nice elder with us for a while.  Handsome and always smiling.  Well, he was transferred and then we heard that he was sent home.  Later we got the story.  He was found smoking and drinking in a bar.  And, also they found out that he was married!!

HUMILITY
Now for a serious note:  A few weeks ago, Gary and Kathy joined a meeting with the Stake Presidency and the bishops.  And, Gary was asked to give a presentation, in Spanish of course, impromptu.  Well, it went very well.   So, a few days ago Gary and Kathy attended another meeting that Gary had arranged a week before, with another Stake President and bishops.  Gary stood up and tried to relate a story in Spanish and it was a total bomb.  Luckily, the zone leaders were with us and they took over and we got the instruction done we wanted.  Well, Gary was devistated.  He felt very embarrassed, put-down, and all the rest that goes along with this kind of incident.  It wasn't until in the middle of the night that Gary woke up and understood why he was humbled so harshly.  This meeting he had plenty of time to prepare a presentation in Spanish but decided to wing it.  It is really hard some times to take instruction, especially with a real life experience to bring the to point home, but, overall, it is worth it.  And, if we can see the lesson in the experience we will have learned.  And, the lesson will have been heaven sent.

Here is a picture of the Grandma and here Grandson, and, a picture of the Sisters that could not get into the church to fill the font, and, the little girl that was baptized.

CHRISTMAS TAMALES

Missionary set-apart

As we probably mentioned before, for the two mission districts that are in our area, the mission president, or, Gary, if the president is not here, handles some items like a stake president would for the people in these districts.  Things such as temple recommend interviews and setting apart and releasing missionaries.   Well, Gary was asked to set apart a missionary.  His name is Elmer and his mission is the Dominican Republic.   Gary had to set him apart in Spanish!   We worried over this for days before the setting apart.  This is a very special occasion for Elmer and his family, and therefore, needs to be done correctly and with the spirit.   Gary prayed and prayed for the proper words and then wrote them down.   We reviewed the words with several priesthood holders and made corrections.  Well, the time finally came.  We drove to this little town, further up in then mountains, called Cerchil. Elmer had his family all gathered and the branch president and the district president was there.  As we should have expected, the disrict president reviewed Gary's words and made lots of last minute changes!  We need to relate an incident that happened many years ago before going on:  when our oldest daughter and son we little kids, they took piano lessons from a very mean and strict teacher.  It was time for a big recital and we were all very concerned.  So, the recital time came, and, our oldest daughter did ok, only a few mistakes. Then, our oldest son played and it seemed to go very well.  We congratulated them both after, then, our oldest son confessed he had missed playing a large part of the song!  Well, Gary did his set-apart, and it seemed to go well. Then Gary reviewed his words and he left out a whole sentence.  But, it sounded ok anyway.   

Here are some photos of Elmer, and Elmer's parents.  Elmer is the youngest of four sons, the older sons have all served missions.  The parents are wonderful people, but have not decided to get baptized yet.

Out with the missionaries

As we mentioned we go out with the missionaries a few times a week.  Well, we went to an appointment with elder Campbell and elder Dial.  We found out later that the missioneries had told the family that we were coming and they had prepared all day.   Understanding that these people are very humble, they must have borrowed wood benches from their neighbors so that we all could sit down. Most of the time, the houses have very few things to sit on.  We arrived, and we met a mom with two teen age daughters and the moms sister.  They had gotten all dressed up for our meeting.  The missioneries gave a wonderful lesson on faith.   They used pictures from a church book, and, elder Campbell pulled out of his backpack a little white board and drew pictures so they could better understand.  We gave a testimony on faith.  (While the lesson was going on, a chicken was walking around and decided to peck at Kathy's skirt.)  Oh, and by the way, these meetings always start with a hymn.  We all sing off key but it works.  After the lesson, we went to their kitchen.  It was like a shack attached to the house.  Wood slates losely attached for walls and the good old corrigated tin roof.  Dirt floor, and no doors, just openings.  They had prepared dinner for us, only us four ate.  They made "Christmas" tamales, which are hard to make, white bread, and Mayan hot chocolate.  The food was great.  And, yet again we left with another spiritual high.  There is no experience quite like teaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and, watching a good missionary at work, especially when the investigators are very interested.

HOLIDAY PHOTOS

This Is Christmas Eve at our house

This is New Years Eve at our house